Parody? Not?

Am watching Van Helsing at the moment and... Gosh, what a bad movie.

Parody?

Please tell me it is one. Everyone talked about it as though it was not. And... Goodness. Reminds me of Vidocq. Which was bad. Stunningly bad. And what's with symbols from the freemasonry context? I thought they were the baddies? Everyone who watched "From Hell" knows that, after all.

Wasn't... Van Helsing... Old? And... why every monster? All gothic novels people still care about in a nutshell? And... is he working together with... Ewoks??? Or... very small Tusken Raiders? And... he is related to... flying gremlins?

Gosh. I cannot get over this. This.... hurts. Am I the only one who hoped that Mr. Hyde would kill him?

I sooo hope that  evadne_noel writes a parody about this one to take revenge. YES!! She did. Here.

Dear me, a werwolf that looks like a very intimate encounter of a doberman and a human and a count Dracula who is Otto Chriek trying hard. Who makes this stuff up?