Roads to Safe Places

Look what I made for T., angie_21_237's little girl. Not that she's old enough to care, but I'm really happy with the result and am working on one for Crocky and me.

I used baby-appropriate wool that is washable and dyed in dye that does not threaten anyone's health. Well, and this pattern.

Lessons learned from the show:

1. If you have unprotected sex, you WILL get pregnant.

2. If you have protected sex, you WILL get pregnant.
3. If you use condoms, they WILL break.
4. If you are on the pill AND use a condom AND have lots of sex, you WILL get pregnant.
5. Girls don't know what masturbation is until they're fifteen.
6. Having an abortion at fifteen is a HORRIBLE HORRIBLE THING.
7. Having a baby at fifteen will make you SO HAPPY. 
8. Being a teenage mother will totally unite your fighting parents AND attract lots of cute guys! 
9. Women belong into the kitchen because they're just GOOD at it.
10. Having a baby at fifteen means your friends will be dying to spend more time with you.   
11. Divorce is WRONG and you WILL get back together. And the best thing about this: you'll have another child! 
12. You cannot keep a secret in High School, EVERYBODY KNOWS EVERYTHING.
13. Teenage dudes will fight tooth and nail to keep their children and get custody, so don't worry, you won't end up raising the kid alone. 
14. It is less likely for people to have a baby if they are married adults taking the same steps to avoid pregancy as teenagers. 
15. If you sleep around a lot before you have a child, your child will be a stillborn preemie. 

Who is funding this show?

I suppose it's good that there is a show that focuses on how having a baby at fifteen is NOT the end of the world and that there are teenage boys who really enjoy fatherhood, but seriously? Having an abortion at fifteen is fine, too, if you don't feel you can handle the responsibility of raising a child just yet and want to focus on, you know, not being a child yourself. 

In the real worlds, babies are not magical plot devices who can fix everything that's wrong in your life story. 

Good: Mrs Homophone 2010 can pronounce a TH now. No one had explained to her before that the "th" is a lisped s, and now she gets things right at least when she's reading. Her speaking is still largely TH-free, but her reading has improved absolutely beautifully. It's weird how people can imitate speech impediments without problems (I made her read an entire page while "lisping"), and then get it right (and made her re-insert the "s"s afterwards), and the level of improvement completely knocked me out.

Dumb: I swear I'm a good, inconspicuous businessdyke when I'm at work. I don't run around all "LOOK AT MAH RAINBOW BRACELET!", but things follow me and I can't help it. I teach three teenage boys on Fridays, they're between twelve and fourteen. ( Today, my students invited me to join their masculinity affirmation ritual. )

Bad: One of my students failed his exam and I don't really know why. He was doing so well, and even though he still has obvious gaps, nothing prepared me for the total wreckage of his last exam; he's not doing himself justice in the content, and the language is all over the place. He can't even bear to look at the paper and he's really demotivated.

One of my students hates poetry, she says.

She doesn't want to have anything to do with it, whenever they're faced with poems in class everything about her speaks her dislike. Her body language, her expression, her moans, how she approaches the topic, the way she deals with it. She just doesn't like poetry and frequently expresses intense dislike when confronted with poetry, she's easily confused and frustrated, and doesn't see the point of dealing with it.

At first I thought it was that specific poem, which was admittedly rather obscure and gave them a second one the next lesson. Again, the same reaction. Frustration, lack of understanding of both content or why rhythm is important at all.

And then I gave her a poem in Russian, her native language. I wish I'd had a camera to capture just how quickly she snatched that sheet ouf of my hands, and how hungrily she read those lines, and how eagerly she engaged with the poem, and the translation provided below. She immediately had a plethora of opinions on this poem, too, I've never seen her that engaged with a poem- any text - ever before.

It was clear that this student, homesick, rejecting all things German, would appreciate the inclusion of her native language in class, but I had just never pictured just how much. I hope I can manage to incorporate the student's native language in German classes in future somehow.

Yes, I'm trying to keep myself from thinking about my exam tomorrow. My two youngest students in the tutoring centre are in sixth and seventh grade respectively and they're at the tutoring centre because their written work is poor. Writing is not the most popular task for many kids, and the fact that their lesson is on Friday afternoon, after school does not help. These lively kids are usually very fidgety and find it very hard to concentrate - no wonder, given the fact that they're in the centre for ninety minutes between two and four on after a week of work!

Last week I had one act out an action with the other had to construct a sentence in the tense that he was revising, and all their sleepiness and demotivation went away as if by magic. Earlier, I had them set each other vocab tests on the board in adjacent rooms to give them an excuse to move around, write on the board, and teach each other rather than doing another test in written work.
A few weeks previous, I had them set each other dictations, which is a little too hard for the kid in sixth grade, but surprisingly doable. Spelling games like Scrabble, Boggle and Quiddler adapted for the needs of my students are also really popular and we usually use those during the last ten minutes. They've been known to insist on staying in ten minutes longer just to finish a game, and they do remember the words they used during the game, so that seems to work, but lately, I've been running out of ideas for quick things that are cost-effective with regards to the lesson time they take up.

My youngest student has not only failed their last vocab test, but he's also supposed to learn the irregular verbs - he never does his homework and learning things by heart seems to be nigh impossible for him. When we talked about their vocab learning methods, the younger dude said something along the lines of, "If I ever did learn my vocabulary lists, I'd probably copy them down and learn them by heart." Pwned by conditional II there, kid.
So ever since I heard that they had to study the irregular verbs I've been trying to come up with ways to make this more fun, and I think I might have found something:

Crocky uses this to teach her younger piano students to read sheet music, and I'm thinking of making something similar for irregular verbs. It's just a slightly shinier way of getting him to quiz himself, really, but who can resist a d12 - even if it happens to have irregular verb forms written on it?!
Also, it's a perfect excuse for me to have fun with cardboard, glue, and possibly even adhesive book covering. Other obvious options include crossword puzzles and bingo, but they also involve sitting down, and this at least allows some moving around. I realise it's not that much.

Are there any other way of getting students to improve their vocabulary? I'm quite partial to the vocabulary duel, too, which might still work with their age group, and similar things to make quizzing each other sound more appealing - especially if they involve moving around.

One of the downsides of studying at home is that I get far too distracted. While reading my texts for my didactics exam I caught myself doodling lesson plans, tried to come up with exercises for Friday (something I scheduled for Friday morning), tried to make up games for my students, tried to think of think of fun writing exercises I can use to get the other students to write, of songs I can use for the listening comprehension crew. I watched a blue tit, planned a story.

But I suppose productivity is a good thing.



( Blue tit (3) )

Also, the moon is particularly beautiful today:


( It's made of cheese (3) )

I hope everyone had a good first Advent Sunday. Do you do anything to celebrate it? Crocky and I lit the first candle of our wreath (a tradition which was supposedly invented by the theologian who founded the school where I did my second internship, Johann Hinrich Wichern) and read together in the evening. I would have liked to sing with her, too, but she was busy on Sunday, so we're doing that tonight. I love singing with her.

So, I want to become a teacher. There are many slightly derisive voices saying that our teachers are only really fit for teaching the middle class population they came from, and they do have a point. Now most of the students in my class have far more experiences with different cultures than I do and radically different backgrounds. Most of them migrated to Germany before they came to school here in Hamburg. I can't imagine what it must be like to be from Turkey, from Albania, from Bolivia - even from Bavaria in Hamburg. Germany must be the most xenophobic country I have ever been to, and living in Willhelmsburg on top of that is not likely to make it any better, as that is one of the areas that other Hamburgians usually tend to look down upon.

I must say that I keep feeling intimidated. How can I, with my rather limited background, be the right teacher for people whose experiences and contexts are so different from mine?
For example. I try and use topics that might interest my students and relate to their world (using popular books, movies, TV shows in my classes), and with my suburban, upper middle-class grammar school classes that usually worked and was not too difficult, as their experiences were very, very similar to mine, but with my current students, I haven't got a clue.

Another example for differences: I looked up some of their favourite artists I didn't know. I didn't have to look up Rihanna or Christina Aguilera, but I'd never even heard of Massiv or Muhabbet. So. Contrasts.

( Read more... )

• A girl, aged 3, and a boy, aged four, playing at horses. Suddenly, the boy falls over, stops whinnying, and the girl and another friend look on. A moment's hesitation. Then,
  "Hey, Ben's dead! Let's EAT him! Yum, yum yum!"
  
  
• A girl, aged 4, and a boy, aged 4, sitting at a table. On the table is a naked baby doll as I enter.
  "What are you guys doing?"
  "We want to eat the baby!"
  *splutter* "Why?"
  "It's so rosy!"
  
  
• A boy, aged 7, comes into the room, all dressed up in black skirts and dresses so that he is entirely covered
  "And what are you? A ghost with a suntan?"
  "I am a dementor!"
  "Argh! Expecto Patronum!"
  "Hm. ... Ok, I am Lord Voldemort. Avada Kedavra!"
  

I had never expected the internship at the kindergarten to be so highly entertaining. There were a few more things, but I forgot them. The children are hilarious. And ill. Of course I caught the first cold I could get, and am now at home, with razorblades down my throat and my head in an oven. I doubt that I will be able to join tomorrow's trip to a playground, somehow, and that's probably for the better, because standing around on a wet playground does not really sound like a good idea right now.

What is better than good ole mise en abyme and Emma Thomson?

Good ol' mise en abyme, Emma Thomson and Maggie Gyllenhaal! 

Oh, and some guy, the main character or something. And Dustin Hoffman! As a literary professor, no less. Goodness.

Usually I don't like it when they muck about with diegesis and hypodiegesis, especially not when both writer's block AND hints at romantic involvement between writers and their characters are involved, but anything's fine as long as Emma's in it. 
I am valiantly going to stand all the mucking about for her sake, the woman is a goddess.

Apart from that - I hate the middle of the week. 
As always, today has been a typical not Orange, but Sleep Deprivation Wednesday, a mix of "I-want-to-leave-this-vale-of-tears"- crappiness mixed with all the small, good stuff like unexpected meetings, muffins, warm cups of tea, friendly professors and easier-than-imagined assignments, taking out books from the library, nice weather, and all that.

Oooh, especially bus rides with teenagers.

Girl 1: "... and then I met her. It's really a shame that she's not in touch with anyone, and it's really getting on my tits."
Girl 2. "Yeah. Talked to her lately? I had the same conversation with (Girl 4) a few weeks ago, you know."
Girl 1: "Seriously?"
Girl 2: "Yeah. Oh, did Girl 3 also tell you about all the problems she had and how her family was going to go back to her country? And Girl 4 has seen her last week. I really don't get that woman. She's off to live under a bridge, doesn't even let us know which one..." 

Apparently it's not as serious as I thought it was going to be. I hate to be impolite, but that last line nearly cracked me up, the way she said it.

I'm still living from day to day, and from weekend to weekend, though... I wonder if that's ever going to change in the near future and with a usual lack of self-preservation part of me hopes it does not, because part of me likes being miserable and mopy, hoping that Crocky might call, thinking about her every other minute. Paaathetic. 
I also wish they had invented little mini-cams that could project a video image of whatever your loved one is doing straight into your glasses if you want to, with a small mic in the frame so that we could talk to each other and see each other wherever we are. 

Hm, no. Sounds as though it would be very straining for the eye-sight, so how about a little monitor set into the back of your hand that can also be used as your mobile phone, your ID, your student ID, your bus ticket and your library card? Could be your ipod and your credit card as well, and various other membership thingies. It would have to be fixed permanently on the skin (and waterproof). Oh, and it'd have to run on solar energy, although there definitely ought to be an "off" or "invisible" option for those who do not want to be visible to the entire population all the time. 
Freedom? Pshaw. Inhabitants of the vale of tears do not want freedom. They only want to feel free.

"Lesbian!"

Seriously, what's up with kids these days?
In the past, when people shouted names at me, it was something fairly insulting, the whole "Fat Cow!" - "Slimy bitch!" - routine. No, nobody's reliving their sad childhood, I am not traumatised, everyone probably has gone through that. The thing is - in the past, when I got shouted at, it was something insulting.
Today, all they can manage is a chorus of: "Lesbian!"

Now, seriously, how do they expect me to react to that? I thought the aim of calling someone names was to make them mad or make them cry, but what on earth are you supposed to say to that?
"Yes, actually, well done for figuring that out."?
So, what's next? "German!" - "Student!"

Things you shout at people from the comforting midst of your group of friends are normally taunting, are normally insults.
They did not even use a derogatory term. Apparently, "lesbian" is considered bad enough. Probably, I benefit from the fact that most people don't bother learning the appropriate derogatory terms, it's only men who get called names, gay or not. Does this leave me glad because it means that I get to feel superior due to the supremely lame tauntings, or mad because they think that "lesbian" is a derogatory term? I mean, I know that "gay" tends to be overused especially by young males to describe anything they don't like, resulting in sentences as meaningful as "Man, this traffic light is so gay! It's never green when I'm here!" - but I didn't know that the same applies to "lesbian".

I've been thinking a lot about those guys lately, seeing as I have seen them nearly every day. Most of them look as though they could be a bunch of rather nice, if bored kids who have nothing better to do in their free time than walking up and down Dumbarton Road.
Seriously - whenever we are out shopping, there they are, skulking around at the parking lot of the supermarket, smoking. Is that considered a hobby among cool youngsters today?
On the weekends, they girls are in full war paint and matching attire and they hang around at the bus stop opposite the library. Makes me think why they're not in the library, it must get cold out there, especially if you're only wearing mini skirts, or baggy jeans and friggin' T-shirts.
It's January, guys!
They seem to have nothing better to do whatsoever. They might as well go somewhere by bus, since they are waiting at a bus stop, and yet, there they are, just standing around that bus stop, smoking.

It is strange, there are two more packs like that, once consisting of about six boys around fifteen, and a group strangely consisting of five girls and one boy, who looks much younger than the lasses. I have never seen them actually do anything, but I see them at the same corner nearly every day on my way home from the university.

What makes them interesting apart from the fact that they use non-derogatory terms for insults and like shouting at me is that they are the age group I'm going to teach, and I wonder what could be done to get these kids something to do. Well, apart from homework.
They puzzle me. Seriously, they seem to have nothing to do, but even though they're always hanging around in front of it, I've never seen them in the library, and I've been there pretty often. But then, maybe I've been unlucky.

How can you get these kids interested in something, how can you make them do something instead of hanging around at a bus stop in the cold?
Even watching TV and eating would be a positive change, some of these girls look as though they'd snap in two if you bumped into them...
A lot of them seem like the guys in my school, and that'd mean that even though they're all tough and dare calling people names in the face - provided they're not alone, and tough enough to smoke at their age, and tough enough to listen to loud, angry music, they're probably also just pretty insecure and rather direction-less.
Tut, not even able to think of proper insults, for heaven's sake!
Although that's probably good, come to think of it. :)

It makes me wonder if that's the kind of youths I'll be facing in my classes, and the odds are high that I will be. Now, how do you broaden someone's horizon without being the cool ideal Mr. Keating-teacher type?

Everything worked out alright during my internship, not one kid like these anywhere to be seen. But then, the school in which I did my internship was Poppenbüttel, a rather privileged upper middle class suburb. There are some problems, but they are absolutely marginal compared to those which teachers in the centre of Hamburg have to deal with on a daily basis. These range from serious drug addiction to children whose parents suddenly get lost due to troubles with Hamburg's underworld, to schools in which free school lunches had to be reintroduced so that the kids would get at least one meal per day.
I may be eager to work with kids, but I am pretty sure that however rewarding it might be to work in St. Pauli, it is not something I could do for long without cracking.

Even with these kids in this comparatively average income-area... Now, I am not a Cool Person, and I doubt that I'll ever be, and if they're like the guys in my class they'll only listen to Cool People... but all the same, there must, must, must be a way to get them interested in something.
Hm, wait, that's a bit rich coming from someone who doesn't have any real hobbies, so maybe I could start getting some hobbies myself before I think about making a change in the lives of innocent kids.

Many hugs!