Home again

[mothwing]

1. Where did all the stuff in my room come from?
2. Did I really own that many books when I left?
3. It is really interesting to see how much dust can assemble in a place like my home in one year.
4. There are butterflies in our basement. They pupating. They were not there when I left.
5. I hate my camera. It once again refuses to work, or, in fact, do anything at all. It stubbornly insists that my card is locked. And it's NOT.
6. Some things were exactly as I had anticipated them - the place is every bit as chaotic as I imagined it, although not quite as bad.
7. My cat ignores me. He is acting every bit the cat he is and refuses to acknowledge my presence. He greeted everybody when we returned but always pointedly would look somewhere else when I was standing directly in front of him, like the sky, or at the floor, or somewhere else.
8. We have two doggies around the house! Dax and Larry, the dog of a neighbour. They are both absolutely sweet and they are making Crocky want a dog because they are so cute. The downside is the hair - all our animals are shedding vast tamounts of hair at the moment. There are huge drifts of hair on the floor in places, the vacuum cleaner can barely keep up.
9. My brother is now even taller than me. He is sixteen. SIXTEEN! Almost a fully fledged human being, not the kid that used to bustle about the place. His favourite past time are still LAN parties and he has discovered that beer tastes bad. His friends have already drunk themselves silly and puked all over the place on occasions. Boys.
10. My grandmother is still as scary as ever and keeps saying that she will die soon. Well, she die at some point, two years, the doctors said, but that is no reason to go round and mention it all over the place.
11. My rabbit is still my rabbit.
12. Our basement is still our basement, although the air is so dusty that even my lungs feel dusty and I fear for Rebecca's lungs.
13. I have no idea what I am supposed to do with the contents of those five boxes. There just does not seem to be any room anywhere, my room was packed when I left. And now? Ought to throw some stuff away... well, after having been trained by moving house, I guess I am now able to do so.

I am home. And it is as though I had not been gone a year at all, maybe just for a long holiday. That is scary and reassuring at the same time. Reassuring because homes are somehow supposed to be lighthouses in the currents of developments, but scary as well because I fear that all those things I did and discovered will be forgotten, parted with, be in the past. Well, they are in the past, but I want them to stay with me. 

I miss Glasgow, but I am also glad to sit here, in this familiar chaos, seeing my family, seeing our animals. What made me happiest is that Crocky has this "I am home!"-reaction as well. 

Off to eat whatever grandma has been cooking today. I bet it will be delicious and really bad for my diet (as if...).

Comments

[count-tygath.livejournal.com]

Dunno, what made me think that, hun. Especially after what I wrote you in my last letter, I should've known, but your post somehow just sounded a bit, dunno, maybe just a bit less stressed out about some things, than I’d thought it would, more in peace with things than I´d expected first, especially since I know how much Glasgow has become a home for you, both of you, during the past year.… I really don´t know. It's hard to explain. The truth is, that I was worried about how you’d feel a great deal, lately. Everything I wrote you about it. Especially the day before yesterday, I thought of you and all this very much. How it´d be for you, you know, back here and all, after all this time, and after having a place of your own. Dunno, what to say, really. You're right, being somewhere and how you feel at the moment are two completely different things, of course. But just so you know, you’re never alone… I’m here to listen whenever you need me. :)

[mothwing.livejournal.com]

Thank you. :)

I'm fine, though, Crocky is here, after all, so don't worry. And for the family - I'm good at coping.